As someone who has left all there family and friends, a secure job and a nice apartment behind to move on their own to a new country and start again I would call myself a pretty independent, self reliant person. But over the last couple of weeks I have had to face my more vulnerable side and realise that there are times when I do need to call someone and ask for help.
I am not the best patient, when I get sick I get “man flu” and think its the end of the world. I don’t battle through it, instead I crawl back into bed and wait for the end… or my recovery. In Australia, when I was living at home (and I may have tried this a couple of times after moving out) I would text my daddy to bring me water, boost juice, toast, a bucket, etc. as I lay in bed dying.
When I broke my toe on Christmas eve I called my mum, who had to drive across town to pick me up, and then spent Christmas to New Years taxiing me around while I was unable to drive.
In Australia, even when my parents where not available there was always a close friend or boyfriend I knew I could call to pop down to the shops and pick up some medicine, comfort food, or just pop over and keep me company while I was being a baby.
A couple of weeks ago it was a concussion, this week it was a cold and slight feinting episode in the shower, and although I am fine it has made me realise that no matter how independent or self reliant you may think you are, you should always have someone you know you can call if you need help. Of course I have my parents and friends back in Australia who I can call, but you also need someone close by.
After my concussion, I was talking to a work colleague, who was shocked to realise I didn’t have anyone to check on me while I was concussed and insisted in exchanging numbers so if anything did happen I could contact her. I now also realise that I do have a group of friends that if needed I could call on for help.
It is important as you establish yourself in a new city or country to identify people in your life who you can call for help when you need it. They don’t always need to be your closest friends, just someone you know will answer your call. Because you never know when you will get sick… get hit in the head by a boom… drop a dumbell on your toe… or need a place to crash for a few nights.
A couple of weeks ago I was between homes, I had moved out of my old house before my
new house was ready following a string of irreconcilable differences between myself and the main tenants of the house (i.e. parties starting at 11pm on a weekday, moving additional people into the house – one I am pretty sure had a drug problem, people going into my room when I wasn’t there, and generally making me feel unsafe). A work colleague and his partner had graciously let me stay in his spare room and had made me feel well at home introducing me to his friends, and eating all their food; but they was off away for the weekend and for 1 night I didn’t have a place to stay so I decided to book into a hotel for the night.
I had rented a car to put all my stuff in for the move, so I had a transport and an entire country to pick my hotel from. Finally Friday afternoon I made my decision and booked a hotel in Belfast. I drove up straight after work and arrived about 9pm. I had booked into a hotel called the Balmoral about 6km from the city centre, and from the outside it looked like a decent place. I didn’t really have any plans and was pretty exhausted so ended up just hanging out in the hotel room and watching telly (considering I don’t own a television it was kind of a treat). The hotel room stunk of cigarette smoke and all the facilities where basic but otherwise it wasn’t too bad.
I went to bed and was woken up about 2am by yelling, and I mean yelling. Three people in the room next to me were getting into a massive domestic in the hotel room, and by the way they shouted, swore and carried on you could imagine that these people where all flannel shirt wearing, front teeth missing and mullet haircut yobbo’s. Security came and told them to keep it down, which they did for about 15 minutes and then they were at it again. This carried on until 5am when security finally kicked them out of the hotel but it was too little too late for everyone in the surrounding rooms.
But I didn’t let it put a dampener on my visit to Belfast, and in the end I was up and out of the hotel by 9am and on my way to the Titanic museum.
I had intended to spend maybe 2 hours max in the museum and then have a quick look around the city before driving back to Dublin. The museum was fantastic, I am not really a reader of all the little bits of information they put around the place at Museums but thank-fully a lot of it is audio and visual as well so you really get a great sense of everything around you. The museum is divided into sections and runs through everything to do with the Titanic; from Belfast the city at the time the Titanic was commissioned, to building the ship, examples of the different classes on the ship, the sinking, the survivors, the review into the sinking, movies made about the titanic, and finding the wreckage years later… Everything about the Titanic is covered and really makes for a fascinating tour.
Four hours later I stroll out of the museum and with no time to look at the rest of the city I jump in the car to head back to Dublin. Now it wouldn’t be a road trip without me getting lost, so after missing my exit and the next exit being closed I decided to use Google Maps to get me back to Dublin…. Well that was an adventure. I ended up going through every little country village between Armagh and Newry before I ended up back on the national motorway and on the right road to Dublin. I was hungry and constantly on the lookout for a little village shop, café, bakery or something to get some lunch but if these places did exists in the little villages I drove through I didn’t see them. Eventually I got back on the motorway and decided I would just have to settle for something at one of those big petrol station / MacDonald / Insomnia all in one stops.
By late afternoon I found myself back in Dublin and pulling up with a car full of gear out front my new home in Irishtown. I was greeted by my new, very excited housemate and after we finished fixing my not quite complete bed I was ready to settle myself into my new home. It had been a ridiculously crazy week, and even my relaxed overnight adventure to Belfast wasn’t as relaxed as I had planned but I did enjoy Belfast and I am keen to get back up there again very soon and check out the rest of the city. My next trip to Belfast though I think I will take the train… J
It is now over 2 months since I first moved to Dublin and my birthday is fast approaching. As such my mum has already been given the heads up that I would like a care package full of the things I am missing from Australia. It is funny, for a country that I am not particularly fond of there are a few things that I really do miss, such as:
Going into one supermarket and being able to buy everything I need! – This is driving me absolutely insane; I walked all across the city centre last weekend going into every Asian / Middle Eastern/ African / Western supermarket I could find looking for endame beans and only found one store on Thursday on the way home from work that stocked them…. In Australia I could walk into any Coles or Woolworths and find them in the frozen veg section of any store.
Cheap, decent quality electronics and appliances. I always took it for granted how cheap and easy it was to get a microwave, new headphones, a television, etc. in Australia. Now, when I need to buy all of those things here in Ireland without the benefit of Australia’s trade agreements with Asia the cost of electrical goods here is SO, SO much more expensive.
Clothes drying in one day. Yes, yes… I know I came to a wet cold country what did I expect… but I did think I would have a dryer.
Old Jamaican chocolate by Cadburys – I forgot to pack a block or two when I left, however this stuff does not travel well in a care package so sadly I will have to wait until someone is coming over here and ask them to bring a block with them.
My friends. I know they are only a phone call, Facebook message, SnapChat away but I miss not having them around on the weekends when you are wanting to just hang out in the park or go shopping. I know I will make new friends that I will be able to do this with eventually but for the mean time I miss my Australian friends.
My dog, Missy.
But all of these cannot be packaged up and sent in my care package from home, so I will have to be more strategic… and a little materialistic on what my care package will contain.
So, for my birthday mummy dearest I would like in my care package:
Bean bag covers – these things are ridiculously expensive in Ireland 80euro and up! In Australia I brought one with filling from Kmart for $25 total. So I would like Bean Bag covers so I can have a bean bag in my room (and some spares just in case).
A Kate Hill overnight/ weekend away handbag and/or side bag – I love Kate Hill handbags and am really missing not being able to order a bag online anytime I want (they don’t ship to Ireland)!
1 double adaptor and 1 power board – I brought 2 Australian to European plug adaptors with me when I came over here, however I must of brought about 6 items which require the adaptors and I am constantly switching back and forth between them, so instead I would like 1 double adaptor and 1 multiple power board so I do not have to be constantly switching back and forth.
Hydralyte – I had a massive hangover the other day so I checked in to the chemist to pick up what in Australia we call Hydralyte – pretty much it rehydrates you. Turns out the Irish stuff tastes horrible and is nowhere near as effective at curing a hangover as the Australian version. So in preparation for my next hangover I would like some Hydralyte (the orange one please).
Brown Brothers Cienna…. Well if I am going to have the Hydralyte I may as well have my favourite bottle of wine to go with it. Still haven’t found anything that I enjoy drinking as much as a bottle of Cienna.
So that is what is in my care package, fingers crossed mummy dearest doesn’t kill me with my list and I shall definitely update you and show you the goodies when it arrives at the end of June! In the meantime I am curious to know what others would have in their care package so feel free to leave a comment telling me what you miss from your country of origin and would have in your care package.
It’s been a few weeks since I last posted something… my bad. Between work, finding a new place to live, moving, getting sick, not having access to my music and all of the other small stresses that have seeped into my life, my motivation for writing has been at a low. I am still not wanting to talk about finally leaving my old house, but when I am ready I will share my story as I think it would be a good warning to others.
But this week I have begun to feel motivated to write and engage in my blog and motivated to be in my life again.
I moved into my new home a fortnight ago and it has been great so far. It is a small two bedroom miner’s cottage in Irishtown, just outside of Dublin’s city center and less than 5 minutes’ walk to the beach. Owing to the housing crisis this 2 bedroom cottage has been converted into 3 bedrooms by turning the lounge room into a bedroom… not that I mind at all, I have always wanted a fireplace in my bedroom!
I love being close to the beach, and although it’s not the same as an Australian beach it does relax me to be so close to the sea. Irishtown is proving a great little suburb, a decade ago it would have been considered one of the more run down suburbs of Dublin but owning to the boom of marketing and IT companies in the Grand Canal Docks, most notably – Google HQ, the area is really up and coming. In-fact Irishtown is sometimes dubbed Googletown owing to the amount of Google employees living in the area. Irishtown, the Grand Canal Docks and Sandymount (all within a stones throw from each other) have many cute little bars, pubs, restaurants, cafes, and organic food stores all within a 10 minute walk from my front door, while if I want to do some serious shopping or have a night out it is only a 30 minute walk or a 10 minute bus ride to the city centre.
It’s a 45 minute walk to work from my new place, which is great; even if I am feeling lazy and don’t want to work out I still get at least 45min of activity each way going to and from work. There are plenty of gyms as well within a 10 minute walk from my front door, a nature reserve, a sport ground, and of course the beach so I am spoilt for choice in creating my new workout routine.
Now that I have moved into my new home I am really starting to feel settled in my new life. I still have to work on finding a permanent job, but now after working in Ireland for the last 2 months and seeing the level of what is expected of employee’s I have grown more confident in my own abilities to break a few glass ceilings.
One thing I have to say about moving to a new city on your own is that you have to be prepared to spend a LOT of time by yourself. This is my third weekend now in Dublin since I moved here and again I have spent the majority of it by myself. Meeting new people is difficult and you really do need to be constantly putting yourself out there if you want to build new friendships and social networks. If you want to sit at home and watch television all weekend that’s cool but that’s not me.
This weekend I planned to do three things which I hoped would help build my social network or at least push my comfort zone a little. I attended a Meet Up group event, went to the Andrea Roche Modelling Commercial Open Day, and went to a new pub to watch the Six Nations Rugby.
The Meet Up group were meeting at a coffee shop in the city center about lunch time Saturday and I had the Open Day after that so I threw on a more dresser outfit then I usually would have worn and headed to the catch up. The Meet Up group wasn’t the right group for me, a little too old and a little too bitchy about life, so I was only there for 45min before I left and headed across town to the Open Day.
I really had no idea what to expect with the Andrea Roche Modelling Commercial Open Day, and it did push my comfort zone buttons a bit, but in the end I am happy I went along. I had found out about the open day after being side tracked looking for a new hairdresser (I figured modelling agencies and Dublin fashion bloggers would be the best people to seek advice for in where to find a good hairdresser experienced in working with blonde hair). I was nervous about going, I am not a 6 foot, size 2, busty blonde but I figured it wasn’t going to cost me anything but my time, it was something different, and I may actually enjoy it.
I walked into a small conference room with about 30 people from 2 – 40 years of age. It was mainly teenage girls, women in their 20’s, and a couple of parents with their children, and everyone critically judging everyone else who walked in the door. There were five people in particular who struck me the moment I walked in; a blonde with a dream-catcher tattoo on her back and the most amazing black and white chequered overalls; two 6 foot brunet’s who instantly reminded me of a BooHoo campaign; and a couple who completely looked the part for a modelling agency. Later I found out that the guy from the couple was a Dublin YouTuber (Rob Lipsett) with a pretty big following, so I wasn’t far off the mark.
I sat there for about an hour waiting to have my mini photo shoot, watching what the other people did waiting for my turn to came around. Finally my name was called and all that ‘I’m just here to give this a go and have some fun’ was out the window. I had no idea what I was doing and felt so conscious of myself with all these other people sitting there watching you. The photographer was great though, she was really encouraging and whether the photos where any good or not she made you feel like you were doing everything right. After my photo shoot I sat down with Andrea and her commercial booking agent where we had a quick discussion about my being from Australia and then about commercial modelling, and then I was done and out the door. Now it may have all been a bust and nothing may come from my little adventure but I gave it a go and who knows, maybe the photos came out better than I thought!
After all that I still had the Rugby to go. After my failings in the pubs of Malahide I thought I would give the Old Borough in Swords a shot. I was running late after the Open day and arrived at half time for the Ireland V Scotland game and was disappointed to find the pub almost empty. I ordered myself a drink and sat down at one of the bars near the sports screen prepared to watch the second half of the game. The second half came and went (not a very impressive game I have to say!) and then it was time for the England v France game and another drink. Again the bar stayed ridiculously quiet, a few people came up and sat at the bar near me, a few people constantly stared at me from a across the room but again I could not get anybody to talk to me. Thankfully I was there to watch the Rugby as well and with England beating France I did not leave entirely unsatisfied with my venture.
After my busy Saturday, Sunday was a very much spent by myself. I am currently living out in the beautiful Malahide (not a convenient place for someone who wants to be in the middle of everything but it does have some amazing parks, running trails, the beach, and little coffee shops at your disposal). I slept in until 7.30am (I do really like being out and about and enjoying the day) before heading down to Devoted to Food in Malahide village for breakfast. This place is still relatively new and not well known, but if you are ever looking for somewhere to go on a weekend for coffee and scones I would highly recommend this place – it also has a locally sourced fresh fruit, veg and butchers attached to it which is remarkably good value.
Apart from that I spent the rest of the day at Malahide Castle and on the running trails, it’s really hard not to want to workout and spend your day outdoors when you have beautiful places like Malahide to workout in.
My housemate’s were having an impromptu BBQ when I got home from my run so I had a bit more of an opportunity to be social Sunday afternoon before we called it a night. A great way to finish off the weekend.
As you can see weekends in a new country can seem very lonesome, but I know they will get better. I have already started to meet new people and as I meet more people and get to know them better I will have more opportunities to go out with them and meet other people through them. But I am enjoying my time, and I am enjoying putting myself out there even if sometimes it does seem like a fail! This week I am off to look at some apartments in the city center and attend another couple of Meet Up events (this one is for 20 Somethings so may be a bit more eventful!), I also have some more blog idea’s up my sleeve as well so please watch this space!